How to Talk Sweet to a Boyfriend

Published: 16th February 2009
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Has your boyfriend ever (in true sincerity) flattered you, complimented you, etc., to the point where you just felt you could burst from all the love and affection sent your way? Did it make you feel truly appreciated, loved, and paid attention to?

Actually, guys like that sort of thing, too. They might not be looking for it in quite the same way, but they like compliments and they like to be flattered (sincerely) by the ones they love. If this is something you haven't tried with your boyfriend before, try it. You'll be surprised how much he'll like it, and will open up to you.

One basic rule about compliments and flattery before we begin
There's really one rule about flattering your boyfriend or saying something sweet about him, and that is that you have to be honest. It might work a time or two if you try to do this without sincerity, but it's not going to last. Number one, you are being dishonest, and that's never a good way to establish a relationship. And number two, he's likely to find out, which is going to cause some very hurt feelings. So be truthful all the time, even with flattery.

Things to focus on
Take a look at your sweetie for a second (even if he's not right there; surely you can conjure him up in your mind's eye). What are some of the things that attracted you to him in the first place? Is he good looking? Does he have a good sense of humor? Does he treat you well, bring you surprises that you weren't expecting but appreciate, etc.?

Take a moment to jot down everything you like about your boyfriend. It can be anything. Brainstorm.

Now, here's where your compliments and flattery are going to come from. (And trust me, guys like to hear this; they just don't show it.) And, oh, yes; there's another rule, too.

Don't just "pile it on"
Compliments and flattery work best when they're used regularly but sparingly; you want to do this often enough that your guy feels really special and appreciated, but not so often that it will sound fake or that it will lose its impact.

Some examples of "talking sweet" to your boyfriend
Take that list of things that you really like about your boyfriend and that you wrote down earlier. Let's say that he's got the most amazing smile you've ever seen. So, next time you kiss him and he gives you that amazing smile, say something like, "I just love the way you smile at me; I can't get over it." He's likely to blush (especially if you haven't done this before), but he'll be really pleased.

Or, let's say that he's really, really thoughtful and is always paying attention to something you need, even if it's not particularly romantic in the traditional sense. Let's say that you've got this leaky faucet in your kitchen, and one day he simply shows up with tools and fixes it without your even asking him to. Now, isn't that sweet? It might not be flowers, true, but he's really showing you that he cares and that he's paying attention to what you want or need.

So if you know that, you can say something like, "That was so thoughtful of you to do that; you are the greatest guy ever. I'm so lucky." He'll feel very, very lucky that he's got a great woman like you who really pays attention to the fact that he cares about you. (And a lot of women don't, you know, so this is something that's really important.)

And that's it; try it on a regular basis. A little well-placed honest flattery based upon what you like best about your guy will have him "swooning" as much about you as you do about him. (Even if for him, "swooning" means that he blushes, clears his throat, and stares at the floor. That's "swooning" in guy talk, and he loves it.)
Find out more about relationships by visiting 100QuestionsBeforeMarriage.com. Blog where many important post about questions
to ask your boyfriend
and questions
to get to know someone
are published. (This article was written by one of our guest authors.)



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